The short answer
- If anyone is in danger, call 999 before anything elseA conversation, a written note and every other step here can wait. An immediate risk to your relative cannot.
- Most problems are still worth raising directly firstLateness, a forgotten task or a house left untidy is usually put right by a calm, specific conversation, not by ending the arrangement.
- Ending the arrangement has a notice period and a costForty-eight hours for hourly care, seven days for live-in care once a carer has worked a week. Visits already agreed are payable in full, unless the reason is unplanned hospitalisation, illness, or another reason the carer agrees to.
- A written care plan stops most of this happening againMost disagreements come from something that was never written down. Agree what the carer does, and does not do, before the next one starts.
PrimeCarers introduces families to self-employed carers. It does not employ them or manage their day-to-day work, so it cannot discipline a carer or decide who is right in a disagreement. What it can do is pass a message between you if you ask, and help you find someone else.
What kind of problem this is
The three kinds of problem, and where each one leads
Not every problem with a carer needs the same response. Working out which of these three you are dealing with tells you where to go next, and stops an everyday disagreement turning into something bigger, or a genuine safeguarding concern being treated as an argument to sort out over tea.
Someone is in danger, or a crime is happening now
The carer has hurt your relative, there is a fire risk, or money or property is being taken by force or threat.
Call 999
You suspect abuse or neglect, but nobody is in danger right now
Unexplained bruising, sudden weight loss, money going missing, or your relative seeming withdrawn or frightened of the carer.
Contact the council's safeguarding team, or call Hourglass free on 0808 808 8141
An everyday problem with how the carer works
Lateness, a task left undone, the house left in a state, or a disagreement about how something should be done.
Talk to the carer directly, calmly and with specific examples
If you are not sure which one you are looking at, treat it as the more serious of the two. A carer who is dismissive about a missed task might just need a clearer conversation; a carer who is dismissive about a bruise that was never explained is a different problem. The rest of this page deals with each one separately, in the order to work through them.
Some disagreements come from a misunderstanding of what a carer is allowed to do in the first place, rather than a refusal to do it. What are carers not allowed to do? is worth reading before you assume something was skipped out of laziness rather than the law.
Suspected abuse or neglect
What happens once you report a concern
A suspicion of abuse or neglect is different from a complaint about how a job was done, and it has its own process, separate from anything to do with PrimeCarers or the arrangement you have with the carer.
- Now
Call 999 if anyone is in immediate danger
This covers a physical assault, a serious injury with no adequate explanation, or your relative being left in a situation that is unsafe right now. The police can attend and act straight away, faster than anything else on this page.
- Before you report
Write down what you have seen, with dates
What happened, when, and who was there, in your own words rather than a conclusion. A note made close to the time is more useful to whoever investigates than a memory reconstructed weeks later.
- Today
Contact the council's safeguarding team
Every council has an adult safeguarding team, reachable through its main switchboard or its website. Under section 42 of the Care Act 2014, a council must make enquiries once it has reasonable cause to suspect that an adult with care and support needs is experiencing, or is at risk of, abuse or neglect.
- Today
Call Hourglass or Age UK if you want to talk it through first
Hourglass runs a free, 24-hour helpline for concerns about the abuse of older people, on 0808 808 8141. Age UK's advice line, 0800 678 1602, covers home care problems more broadly and can help you decide whether something needs reporting.
- After you report
The council decides what happens next
It might speak with your relative, ask the carer to respond, or involve the police if there is a possible crime. Investigating is the council's job once it has been reported, not yours.
Neither the police nor the council need PrimeCarers involved to act. PrimeCarers is not a party to the care arrangement between you and the carer, and it does not employ, supervise or investigate carers itself.
Talking to the carer
Having the conversation before you decide anything else
If what happened is lateness, a forgotten task, or a difference of opinion about how something should be done, a conversation usually settles it faster, and better, than skipping straight to ending the arrangement.
What tends to work
- Pick a calm moment, not straight after the thing that annoyed you
- Describe one specific incident, with the date, rather than a general complaint
- Say plainly what you would like to happen differently next time
- Listen to their side; a rota clash or a genuine misunderstanding is common
- Write down what you agree, so you both remember it the same way
What tends to make it worse
- Raising something serious by text message when it needs a proper conversation
- Several unrelated grievances at once, so nothing gets fixed properly
- Assuming the worst explanation before you have asked
- Involving your relative in the disagreement if conflict distresses them
- Letting it go unsaid and hoping it stops on its own
A written care plan makes this conversation easier, because you are pointing at what was agreed rather than relying on memory. Building a care plan with your carer has a starting template if you do not already have one, and building a positive relationship with your private carer covers the everyday side of working well together, which prevents more of these conversations than it resolves.
If talking does not fix it
Mediation, and how ending the arrangement works
If a conversation has not worked, or the problem is too serious for one, there are two more things to understand before the relationship ends: asking someone else to help you talk it through, and knowing exactly what ending it involves.
Mediation means bringing in a third person, neutral to both of you, to help find a way forward rather than to decide who was right. That might be a family member who knows you both, or asking PrimeCarers to pass a message between you: PrimeCarers can facilitate communication between a client and a carer if either of you asks, though it does not decide the outcome or set the terms of your arrangement. For something more formal, Age UK's advice line on 0800 678 1602 can talk through your options.
If mediation does not work, or you decide to move on regardless, here is what ending the arrangement involves in practice.
| Hourly care | Live-in care | |
|---|---|---|
| Notice to end the arrangement | 48 hours, from either side | 7 days, once the carer has worked 168 hours (about a week); 48 hours before that |
| Visits already agreed | Payable in full, unless the reason is unplanned hospitalisation, illness, or another reason the carer agrees to | The same rule applies |
| If there is a safety concern right now | Simply do not book the next visit; 48 hours' notice still applies to anything already booked | You can ask the carer to leave the home immediately for a safety concern, serious misconduct, or a breakdown of trust; they should leave within a reasonable time |
| What PrimeCarers does | Charges nothing to end an arrangement; does not set the terms between you and the carer | The same |
Notice to end the arrangement
- Hourly care
- 48 hours, from either side
- Live-in care
- 7 days, once the carer has worked 168 hours (about a week); 48 hours before that
Visits already agreed
- Hourly care
- Payable in full, unless the reason is unplanned hospitalisation, illness, or another reason the carer agrees to
- Live-in care
- The same rule applies
If there is a safety concern right now
- Hourly care
- Simply do not book the next visit; 48 hours' notice still applies to anything already booked
- Live-in care
- You can ask the carer to leave the home immediately for a safety concern, serious misconduct, or a breakdown of trust; they should leave within a reasonable time
What PrimeCarers does
- Hourly care
- Charges nothing to end an arrangement; does not set the terms between you and the carer
- Live-in care
- The same
Terms from the PrimeCarers client and carer contract, current as of September 2026.
None of this needs a solicitor. If a carer disagrees with what you owe, or you disagree with what they are asking for, ask PrimeCarers to pass messages between you, and put whatever you agree in writing. The full contract terms set all of this out in detail, including bank holiday and Christmas Day rates and what happens if a visit is cancelled at short notice.
Choosing again
What to check differently with the next carer
Most of what goes wrong the first time is avoidable the second time, once you know what to look for before a carer starts rather than after.
Before the next carer starts
0 of 6 ticked
Before you interview
Before the first visit
In the first few weeks
Background checks on a private carer sets out exactly what an identity check, a right to work check, an enhanced DBS check and an interview each confirm, and what they do not, so you know what you are relying on before the next carer starts. When you are ready, search carers near you and start again with a clearer plan in place.
Questions
Questions families ask about problems with a carer
Decide which kind of problem it is before anything else. If your relative is in immediate danger, call 999. If you suspect abuse or neglect but nobody is in danger right now, contact your council's safeguarding team or call Hourglass free on 0808 808 8141. For an everyday problem, such as lateness or a missed task, a calm and specific conversation with the carer usually resolves it faster than escalating straight away.
If someone is in immediate danger, call 999. Otherwise, contact the safeguarding team at the council where your relative lives; under section 42 of the Care Act 2014, the council must make enquiries once there is reasonable cause to suspect abuse or neglect. You can also call Hourglass, a free 24-hour helpline for concerns about older people, on 0808 808 8141, or Age UK's advice line on 0800 678 1602 if you want to talk it through first.
For hourly care, either side can end the arrangement on 48 hours' notice. For live-in care, it is 7 days once the carer has worked 168 hours, or about a week; 48 hours applies before that. If there is a safety concern, serious misconduct, or a breakdown of trust with a live-in carer, you can ask them to leave the home immediately rather than waiting out the notice period, and they should leave within a reasonable time. The full contract terms set this out in detail.
Visits already agreed are payable in full, unless the reason is unplanned hospitalisation, illness, or another reason the carer agrees to. This applies whether you are ending things because of a problem or for any other reason. It is worth agreeing this directly with the carer in writing, and PrimeCarers can pass a message between you if that helps.
PrimeCarers is an introductory service, not the carer's employer or a care provider, so it does not supervise a carer's work, discipline them, or decide who is right in a disagreement. What it can do is pass a message between you and the carer if either of you asks, and help you find a different carer if the arrangement ends. How we vet every carer explains what is checked before a carer's profile appears in the first place.
No. An identity check, a right to work check, and an enhanced DBS check kept current on the Update Service confirm who somebody is, that they can legally work here, and whether anything relevant is on record with the police. None of them tells you whether a carer is reliable, organised, or a good fit for your relative day to day. Background checks on a private carer covers what each check does and does not cover.
Most repeat problems come from something that was never written down the first time. Agree a specific, written care plan before the next carer starts, covering what they will do, in what order, and what you expect if plans change. Building a care plan with your carer has a starting template.