The short answer
- Ask your parent what they would likeSome people want a full table and some want a quiet day with two good phone calls. Plan around their answer.
- A companion can cover the hours that matter mostLunch together, a short walk, the King's speech and a video call with the family can all fit into one visit.
- Plan the days either side as wellChristmas Eve, the weekend and the gap before New Year can be quieter than the day itself, so give each one a call or a visit.
- There is free company tooCommunity Christmas and befriending calls from charities cost nothing, and they sit alongside a paid visit rather than instead of it.
Carers offering companionship on PrimeCarers charge £15 to £20 an hour with our fee included. Under the contract, Christmas Day is charged at twice the carer's normal rate and bank holidays at one and a half times.
Ask them first
Start by asking your parent what they would like the day to be
It is easy to plan the Christmas you would want for them. The day belongs to your parent, and the plan works better when it starts from what they say rather than from a picture of a full table.
Questions to ask, a few weeks before
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The day itself
The days around it
Listen to the answers rather than trying to change them. If your father says he would like Boxing Day to himself, that is a plan, and the task is to put a call at either end of it. If your mother has lost a husband or wife since last Christmas, this Christmas may feel different from the ones before, and companionship after a bereavement is worth reading before you talk. If your parent has dementia, keep the plan simple and familiar, and tell whoever visits what the day usually looks like.
If they say they do not want anybody coming in at all, how to help someone accept care has ways of raising it that keep the decision theirs. Some people find it easier to agree to somebody coming for lunch than to somebody described as a carer.
A companion on the day
What a companion visit on Christmas Day, Boxing Day or New Year's Eve can look like
A companion visit is time spent with your parent rather than a list of jobs. On a holiday it can be the part of the day your parent chose, filled with what they said they would like.
Lunch together
Cooked, warmed or both
A walk or a short trip out
If the weather allows
The King's speech and a film
The afternoon
Calls with the family
At a time you agree
The details of a visit are for you, your parent and the carer to agree, and it helps to write them in a message: the start and finish times, what the day is for, and anything the carer should know, such as a favourite programme or a subject to avoid. What a companion visit looks like, hour by hour walks through an ordinary one, activities to try with a companionship carer has more ideas, and can carers take you out covers trips out.
A familiar face matters more on Christmas Day than on any other. If a new companion is doing the day, book an ordinary visit in early December so your parent meets them first. Carers on PrimeCarers are self-employed and decide which days they work, so ask early and do not assume anybody is free.
Plan the whole week
A plan for the holiday week, day by day
The days either side of Christmas Day have no lunch to organise and fewer calls, and they are worth a line each in the plan. This is one family's week, written down so everybody knows who is doing what.
An example plan for Christmas week 2026
For a mother who lives alone, with her family two hours away until New Year’s Day
Wed 23 Dec
Two days before
- Who rings
- Your sister rings at teatime to go over the plan.
- Who comes
- The usual weekly visit from a companion, who takes your mother to the shops for the last bits.
- The day
- Buy the food for Christmas lunch and anything she wants in for the long weekend.
Thu 24 Dec
Christmas Eve
- Who rings
- You ring in the evening, at the time she chose.
- Who comes
- A neighbour drops in with a card in the afternoon.
- The day
- The carol service on the radio, and the table laid for tomorrow.
Fri 25 Dec
Christmas Day
- Who rings
- A video call with the grandchildren at 11, and you ring again before bed.
- Who comes
- A companion from 12 until 4: lunch together, a short walk if it is dry, the King's speech at 3.
- The day
- The part of the day she said she least wanted to spend alone.
Sat 26 Dec
Boxing Day
- Who rings
- Your brother rings mid-morning.
- Who comes
- None booked. She wanted a quiet day with the leftovers and the television.
- The day
- A day she chose to have to herself, with a call either end of it.
Sun 27 Dec
A quiet Sunday
- Who rings
- A friend from church rings after the morning service.
- Who comes
- None booked.
- The day
- Nothing arranged, which is why two people have promised to ring.
Mon 28 Dec
Bank holiday
- Who rings
- Your sister rings at lunchtime.
- Who comes
- A two-hour companion visit in the afternoon, the first time she goes out after Christmas.
- The day
- A drive to the garden centre café, if she feels like it on the day.
Thu 31 Dec
New Year's Eve
- Who rings
- Family ring before 10, since she will not stay up for midnight.
- Who comes
- A companion for the early evening: supper, a film and a game of cards.
- The day
- An evening with company in it, finished at the time she likes to go to bed.
Fri 1 Jan
New Year's Day
- Who rings
- You ring in the morning to hear how the week has been.
- Who comes
- You arrive for the weekend.
- The day
- The end of the plan, and a chance to ask her what she would change next year.
- Who rings
- Who comes
- The day
Not every day in the example has a visit, and it does not need to. The quiet days have a call booked instead, from somebody who has promised to ring, and one day was left empty because that was what the mother asked for. Two things make a plan like this hold together. The first is writing the times down, so the calls are spread through the week rather than all arriving on Christmas morning. The second is giving a copy to everybody in it, including the companion and a neighbour who could knock on the door if a call goes unanswered.
If your parent is housebound, the visits carry more of the week, and companionship for someone who is housebound looks at that. If you are worried about loneliness well beyond Christmas, how to help a lonely elderly person covers building a week with fewer empty days all year round.
Free lunches and calls
Christmas lunches and befriending calls that cost nothing
Some of the company in the week can come from charities and local volunteers. These are the national names to know. Each runs its own service in its own way, so read their pages or ring them rather than relying on a description from us.
| Who runs it | The kind of help | |
|---|---|---|
| Community Christmas | Marmalade Trust, a loneliness charity | Connects people who would otherwise be alone with local hosts offering company on Christmas Day. |
| Telephone Friendship Service | Age UK | A regular phone call with a volunteer, arranged in advance. |
| The Silver Line Helpline | Age UK, which now runs the Silver Line | A helpline for older people to ring when they would like somebody to talk to. |
Community Christmas
- Who runs it
- Marmalade Trust, a loneliness charity
- The kind of help
- Connects people who would otherwise be alone with local hosts offering company on Christmas Day.
Telephone Friendship Service
- Who runs it
- Age UK
- The kind of help
- A regular phone call with a volunteer, arranged in advance.
The Silver Line Helpline
- Who runs it
- Age UK, which now runs the Silver Line
- The kind of help
- A helpline for older people to ring when they would like somebody to talk to.
Dates, eligibility and how to sign up are set by each organisation and change from year to year. It is worth asking in the autumn rather than the week before.
You can read about Community Christmas on the Marmalade Trust site, and Age UK has pages on its Telephone Friendship Service and the Silver Line Helpline. A local church, lunch club or residents group may also have something on, and whoever runs your parent's usual group will know.
A volunteer and a paid companion do different things. A befriender gives their time at a point that suits them, for company only, and a charity cannot promise they will be free on Christmas Day. A paid companion comes at the hour you agree and can cook, drive or help around the house as well. The two can sit alongside each other, and befriender, volunteer or paid companion sets them side by side. When you are ready to look for somebody for the day, you can search for companions near your parent and ask who is free.
Questions
Questions families ask about company at Christmas
Yes, a single companion visit on Christmas Day is possible if a carer near your parent is free and willing. Carers are self-employed and choose which days they work, so ask early and agree the times in writing. Booking one ordinary visit beforehand means your parent is not meeting a stranger on the day.
The contract charges Christmas Day at twice the carer's normal rate. Carers offering companionship on PrimeCarers charge £15 to £20 an hour with our fee included, so a Christmas Day hour is £30 to £40, and about £36 at a typical rate. Care over Christmas and bank holidays has the other days.
Take her at her word, and agree a few set times when family will ring so the day has some contact in it. Ask about the days either side as well, because a quiet Christmas Day is different from a quiet week. If she changes her mind nearer the time, a call or a visit can still be added.
Yes. Community Christmas, run by the Marmalade Trust, connects people with local hosts offering company on the day, and Age UK runs a telephone friendship service and the Silver Line Helpline. Each sets its own arrangements, so look at their pages or ring them early.
Yes, that is an ordinary part of a companion visit. Agree the time of the call with the family beforehand and tell the companion which device and app your father uses, so they are not working it out on the day.